Behold!

The cutting edge in Soviet transportation technology!

From the 1930's...

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Thought for the Day

Never piss off someone who buys rocket fuel by the teraton.

This message is brought to you by Imperial Navy Intelligence - Section Six. "We don't exist."
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And Now For Something Completely Different

A theme song for Uncle Dennie:



If you don't know who Uncle Denny is he's the fellow with the cap here:



Or you can read about him in Friends In High Places.

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An Idea

So over the weekend I started to think about writing another script. I haven't even finished the first script and already I'm thinking of starting another.

It would be an organized crime thing set in present day Minneapolis under the working title of MURDERAPOLIS.

While in the process of disposing of two bodies (I'm thinking dumping them in Lake Superior here) the local boss says, "if the mayor knew what the real murder rate was he would shit like a dead man."

I think I have a cool idea for the ending too.
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So Anyway

I had a bit of a bitch of a time trying to get past the new Google Login-Mode for Blogger.

It sucked.
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A Personal Vision

I'm also going to use this blog to write about my cinematic project. A film set in the Official Traveller Universe which presently has the working title of THE BOUNDARY.


This scene does not exist, it is a conceptual drawing.

At the moment the screenplay is at 56 pages. I had originally set a goal of 90 pages but the way things were going with the script it would appear that 100 to 110 pages is a more reasonable objective. I'm also thinking of going back and rewriting some of the villain's scenes in order to illuminate his background and goals.

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Groan!

Mr. Welch continues to add to his list of things he cannot do during a role playing game:

975. There is something wrong with a 2nd level Kamikaze.

Yes. I can see the problem with that.
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Quote of the Day

The stolen plans were not found aboard the ship, but I believe they may have been smuggled in the company of droids down to the surface below. I have no explanation for the sudden and acute idiocy of the officer who let the escape pod go, but I have confidence that his sudden and acute death has inspired a new level of diligence on the part of his colleagues.

-- Darth Vader, Sith Lord.

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I'm Who?

I am: Robert A. Heinlein Beginning with technological action stories and progressing to epics with religious overtones, this take-no-prisoners writer racked up some huge sales numbers.

Which science fiction writer are you?

Gosh, what a surprise.
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Need to do more on this blog.

This week I had a nightmare that I was kidnapped by a group led by someone claiming to be L. Ron Hubbard. But he didn't sound like LRH.
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Some More Things One Must or Must Not Do During Role Playing Games

Thus sayeth Mr. Welch:

851. When plumbing the depths of depravity, I must remember to come up for air.

856. A funeral is not a proper place for setting new fashion trends.

860. Under religion I cannot put Born Again Klingon.

861. I will not use undocumented zombie workers to help build my castle.

865. I do not put the cad in decadent, nor the rave in depraved.

867. We all play bards just to relive our favorite Spinal Tap moments.

868. I cannot have a gun with an area of affect larger than it's range.

872. Any gun that sets off the metal detector before I even pass through it is vetoed.

Um. Okay.
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These Dreams

Had a weird dream involving a woman who looked and sounded a lot like Emma Thompson, a grand hotel with an antagonistic staff, and a chief antagonist (Solomani Texan) who would not respond properly when I pull out an ID card and say things like "I am an Imperial Lord", "I have an Imperial Warrant", and "SHUT THE F**K UP!"

That's where I woke up.
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And Now...

The number of things that Mr. Welch cannot do in a role playing game is now up to 850:

827. My battlemech does not play Dixie every time I hit the jump jets.

829. Despite the song's claim, a pelvic thrust does not cause Sanity loss.

833. Overrunning a larger army is not a glorious victory if it happened at 3AM and they were still in bed.

Except in Texas when you overrun the Mexican Army at siesta time.

To continue:

837. Even if the rules allow it, I can't take the 1st Armored Division as an ally.

839. In the middle of a black ops no inserting a memo into the target's computer mandating 'clothing optional Mondays'.

842. When handed Dieties and Demigods and told to pick a god for my druid, I will skip right by the Cthulhu Mythos.

845. It's not a good idea to taunt Greek heroes with "Who's your daddy?"

Don't do this to Uncle Dennie, either...

To continue:

849. The FBI tends to notice when people buy several miles of hamster tubing at once.

850. Doesn't matter how practical, we aren't reanimating the dead dragon and having him haul that horde back for us.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled reality.
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And Now...

The number of things that Mr. Welch cannot do has increased from 800 to 825:

803. If my personal carried firepower exceeds that of the Battleship Texas, there's a problem.

808. Covering fire does not include nuclear weapons.

813. Taking the orc warlord's skull as a trophy is acceptable. Not as a hand puppet.

816. The adventure wrap up is the epilogue. Not Miller Time.

822. If everybody in the room is in black leather, we're in the thieves' guild. Not a fetish club.

Um, okay...

We now return you to your regularly scheduled reality.
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Ship Names

I was going through some files and found a list of
warship names that I was going to use for a Tech Level-12
pocket empire:


Imperial Navy (Freya)


Resolution Class Missile Frigate (24 units)

Resolution, Resister, Revenge, Res-Publica, Realist,
Red-Giant, Retribution, Retaliation,
Revolution, Renegade, Red-Dwarf, Reaction, Rectifier,
Rent-Asunder, Red-Shift, Restorer,
Redeemer, Renderer, Remnant, Remainder. Renown,
Repulse, Restitution. Renaissance.


Nemesis Class Cruiser (8 units)

Nemesis, Corisande, Scourge, Lamia, Black-Star,
Victrix, Grendelsbane, Sungoddess


Freya Class Fleet Carrier (4 units)

Freya, Eos, Magenta, Columbia.


Ranger Class Light Carrier (6 units)

Ranger, Bonhomme Richard, Guerriere, Essex,
Enterprise, Hornet.


Aristotle Class Battleship (2 units)

Aristotle, Ayn Rand.


Audacity Class Destroyer (40 units)

Audacity, Adamant, Animosity, Enmity, Antagonist,
Adversary, Assailant, Contender, Aversion,
Antipathy, Aversion, Anger, Annoyance, Agitate,
Aggravate, Arrogance, Insolence, Flippant,
Sassy, Audacious, Brazen, Hussy, Annoyance, Tart.
Aspire, Ambition, Objective, Rancor, Venom,
Indignant, Bitter, Irate, Furious, Incensed,
Indignant, Inflamed, Aroused, Impassioned, Incited,
Fervent.



I haven't named any SDB's yet.

These Are Some Of My Favorite Things

One of my favorite online comics pages is SOMETHING POSITIVE.

In the current story a bunch of snot-nosed punks are going to make a pathetic attempt to scare old Fred MacIntire.

Little do they know that Fred once accidently made a human sacrifice to C'Thulhu.

Here's A Fact:

I like to read SOMETHING POSITIVE.
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And Now...

There are now 800 things that Mr. Welch is not allowed to do:

772. Not allowed to base a paladin off Lee Marvin.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled unreality.
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Someone Else's Thought For The Day

In deep space, nobody can hear you vent the trash, or the tax collector...

-- Mark Urbin, Traveller Mailing List, October 13, 2006

The Truth About Penguins In The Traveller Universe.

If anything, the apparently humble penguin is the central component to the mystery of why the Solomani, the Humans of Terra, were so slow to develop spaceflight and the jump drive.

The various species of penguin that we know of were Genetically Engineered by Yaskodray (a.k.a. Grandfather) as a means to suppress the growth and technological progress of Terrestrial Humans. The penguin brain while individually unimpressive, served as a component of a group mind which in turn functioned on Terra as a False Ruling Consciousness, an entity that the Solomani have commonly called "God."

The False Ruling Consciousness, being physically isolated on the Antarctic continent, would send psionic messages to various "prophets" who would in turn command their respective followers kill each other in progressively bloodier wars. This also had the unfortunate result of blackening the name of God in the minds of the Solomani as that the gods of most other races were more emotionally secure and far less prone to acting out.

It was when Claw and Beak disease was accidentally introduced to the primary penguin population by a British naval expedition ("Jenkins, STOP THAT!") that the False Ruling Consciousness became too weak to influence human affairs. Thus allowing the Solomani people to expand into deep space and attempt to take their rightful place in the Universe. ("Today, North Minehead...")
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