Wednesday, January 21, 2009

From the Unpublished Memoirs of Allen Keller.

Saint Paul, Minnesota
January 20, 2009



There were two inauguration ceremonies in the rotunda of the State Capital in Saint Paul.

The first was the elevation of the Lieutenant Governor to Governor of the state of Minnesota.

Then at eleven in the morning, local time, we did the president.

John Andrew March took the oath of office and then gave a short speech. It wasn't really inspirational, but there were definite Randian elements to it.

First, John never mentioned Socialism or Communism by name. He did mention Hitler, Stalin, and Mao, but that was in reference to the personality cult that emerged around The Zero.

Second, as Rand did throughout Atlas Shrugged and her later writings John described the actions of The Zero and his followers as manifestations of primitive or barbaric behavior.

The look on The Beast's face when John said all that was priceless.

Yes, the Junior Senator from New York was there. I'm sure virtually everyone there had the same thought I had

What. The. Fuck?

I had yet to talk to the Junior Senator or any of the staff people that came with her but I do have a theory.

The Junior Senator (I shall refrain from calling her The Beast or The Bitch for the time being) still wants to be president and I don't think that she wants to go down on the Speaker of the House to get the job.

That's my theory for the time being.


Minneapolis, Minnesota
January 23, 2009



The Hennepin County Jail was getting a bit crowded.

The Zero ordered the arrest of President March and everyone else actively involved with the Provisional Government. (Oddly enough, he didn't order the arrest of the Junior Senator from New York.)

Believe it or not, someone actually tried to carry out that order.

The first were a bunch of idiots from the local office of the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms in their SWAT Team "cool guy" gear who tried to storm the March family residence in the Kenwood area of Minneapolis. They were stopped by Military Police from the Minnesota National Guard.

There were one hundred percent fatalities for the BATF agents. (I didn't bother to ask our guys about the nine millimeter holes in the backs of three of their heads.)

Then the Major of Minneapolis, a partisan of The Other Party, got into the act.

He called up the chief of police and ordered him to make the arrest. Prisoners were actually taken this time. His former Honor, the now former Major, the Chief of the Minneapolis Police, and five of the officers who were stupid enough to follow orders are now in the Hennepin County Jail. Three more police officers are in hospital under armed guard. Four officers are in the Hennepin County Morgue.

Everyone else in local law enforcement got the message. Don't fuck with us.

The Special Agent in Charge of the Minneapolis office of the FBI tried to put a call through to President March. I took the call. First, he pledged loyalty to President March and the Provisional Government. Not surprising given all of the National Guard and Army Reserve Humvees parked around the Federal Building and City Hall (they're across the street from each other) in downtown Minneapolis after the BATF and MPD incidents. Second, he passed on a couple of pieces of information from the Bureau's Chicago office.

Then there was the fun (I'm being sarcastic here) we had with the local media.

We called a meeting of the managements of the local newspapers, television, and radio stations at a convenient location. Not everyone we summoned showed up.

The folks from KLMN-TV, KLMN-AM and KLMN-FM, which were the local branch of the Lackland Media empire were one hundred percent with us. Everyone else was to one degree or another being a problem.

I had to stomp on them. Hard.

"Senator Null and the caucus of The Other Party in the House of Representatives have by their own actions repudiated the Constitution of the United States." I said. "Without the Constitution there is no First Amendment, and without the First Amendment you are all dead meat. And anyone who opposes the Constitution simply cannot claim protection under it. Have I made myself clear?"

There was still a lot of grumbling, especially from the editors of Minneapolis Star-Tribune, the local rag of The Other Party. I originally wanted to hang the entire reporting and editorial staff of the Star-Tribune, minus the token conservative columnist and that Lileks guy, from the Third Avenue bridge in Minneapolis, pour encourager l'autres. But we had to tread carefully at the
time as there were still too many people, especially in the armed forces, who were sitting on the political fence.

Then there was the fun we had with the two radio stations that didn't send anyone to the meeting.

One was the local FM-affiliate of the Pacifica network. The other was the AM-affiliate of the former Air America network.

On air personalities on both stations openly called for riots and the assassination of President March.

We didn't shut the stations down. We simply seized them and put some radio geeks from Our Party in charge and had them play "What's The Frequency, Kenneth?" By R.E.M. on continuous loop. The station staffs joined the other supporters of The Zero in the Hennepin County Jail.

The level of restraint we showed to the opposition lasted for about a total of ten days.

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